Split in Two

The melancholic feel has come back, again. I hate it.

While driving to my grandpa's for dinner, the topic of further education has somehow wriggled and squirmed its way into the conversation; and that's where I've found myself facing a fork road.
Truth be told, I'm not sure what and where I want to be, or what I'm interested in. Yes, I'm quite fickle.

I know a few of my friends have already started their college courses; Cass is taking mass com, Alex has flown far to take Pol-Sci in Stanford, Fookix taking law, Felicia taking...I think it's architecture, and Jake is taking computer science. A few others are planning to take Form 6, like Kok Shien, Cynthia and Max; while some others are out in the real world.
Only a few others, including me, are still very clueless and still floating in between the transition of graduating from high / secondary school to attending college / university.

My previous plan was to take a matriculation course and then enter university. Well, I've gotten part of my future figured out- the college part that is. But what to do after that, I'm not quite sure.
A year ago, I set myself to study pharmacy. But thinking back, it's kinda like a one rank job. There's no corporate ladder to climb; you're stuck there until you retire. I want something where I can climb and well...earn a pretty good living.

Dad did say that I could get my bachelors or masters in pharma then do a degree in business management; that way, I can manage a hospital.
He then added that I could be a doctor, a specialist to be more specific. It takes around 11 years (or somewhere around there) of studying to be a specialist. By the time I get out of school, I'll be...30! WTH!
(30 is still an estimation and only if I do 1 1/2 years of matriculation. I think it takes 7 years to be a GP and another 4 to specialize in a certain human anatomy.)
Both jobs have the same advantage; it'll be one of the first professional job amongst all my cousins and second amongst the whole family, uncles and aunts included (first is dad).
I don't know about mom's side of the family though, there are a whole bunch of lawyers, engineers and doctors at her side.

It's really tough making a decision on one's future career, it's like making a gamble with your life at stake. I did tell him that and he told me to take Form 6. Over my dead body. I don't want to go through hell again. As if I'm not already sick of the exam-oriented scheme. I still recall him saying that STPM is one exam that'll scar you for the rest of your life. Even he still admits that he has nightmares about it.

Gah, I don't want to think about it anymore. I'll just wait for the results to be out in March and just go for whatever course that my marks will take me.
Now, I'm scared to think about the grades. *bawl*

EDIT: Felicia's taking interior designing.