What To Do Next

Well, every fifth former is experiencing their new found freedom.
I did say that I'd do everything in my to do list; but unfortunately, I'm broke. Everything that I want to do needs money, but in this world (or any other world) the same philosophy follows: No Money, No Talk.
Before, it was no freedom but have money; now it's got freedom but no money. What the hell?
Yeah, I'm not as fortunate as some people who can afford to buy or do anything they want or desire. Contrary to the belief of anyone, I'm not rich at all.

The good thing is, I'm back at my desk! The computer technician just fixed my internet link and upgraded my RAM to a smacking 752 MB, which means that CABAL will be much smoother. Sweet.

I did tidy up my room today. I took out all my uniforms and my other school stuff and packed it in the store room. That's the last time I'll ever see them. I even threw my school shoes out. Bye bye, my black friend.
Thinking back, I don't think I've worn the normal pinafore for such a long time. I've been in my librarian uniform since Form one. I only did get to wear the normal pinafore for umm... three months or so before changing. I doubt I even remember how I look like wearing a pinafore or the baju kurung. Blek, no point going back there.

What's now?
I guess I could start my driving lessons two weeks from now. Then, I could take my language lessons to fill up my time. With the knowledge of two new languages, I could diss people without them even knowing. Oh, that could be so awesome.

Je nai, baka. XD

FREEDOM is the Word

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
OH YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Yup, I've finally finished the last of the public exams! I'm finally FREE!
I've screamed at the top of my lungs in my room and jumped up and down in excitement for 20 minutes before dropping myself hard onto my bed.

Here's the funny thing that happened during the examination...
Today, Wen Kai brought an alarm clock to the last paper, EST I. At first glance, I kinda had a hint what he was about to do, but didn't know that he'd actually do it.
Do what?
He set the alarm clock to ring at exactly 3.15 p.m, the time we finish the paper.
It was kinda funny. The alarm clock started to ring the moment the invigilator wanted to pick up the microphone to say that the time is up. The whole hall (or rather 30 students to be exact) burst into laughter! Hey, even the invigilators were chuckling too!
The alarm clock sounded the loudest to me cause he's sitting behind me.

As I was walking out to the gates, I did have a sense of nostalgia. This was the school I studied in for 5 years, no matter how much I disliked it. There's no such thing as graduation party or any of that sort in this country. As soon as you're done with SPM, you've already graduated. No party, no fun, nothing.

I must admit, there's a few things I'll happily live without.

1. No more uniforms! But it isn't all that great. Now, I'd have to think of what I want to wear everyday! Gah!
2. No more lousy teachers. That's the sweet part. Cause you're paying for education, the college has to provide good lecturers and they'd have to help you with your academic troubles.
3. No more early morning classes. The earliest would probably be at 8. There's no longer the need to wake up at 6 to get to school.
4. No more stinky toilets. Gawd, I've lived with smelly toilets for 11 years of my schooling days and will finally be rid of it.
5. The constant cut of electricity. This school has more cuts than any school.

Well, I will miss some of the teachers and probably something else that I can't think of now.

Speaking of secondary school, I don't think it turned out to be what I imagined it to be when I was between the transition of primary to secondary. I'd always imagined that we'd be walking to different locations for classes and the library would be open the whole time. I'd also thought that I'd actually be able to go out shopping with friends on weekends or have my social calendars filled with stuff to do. You know, like the high school life everyone sees on tv...
It wasn't like that at all.

But I am glad that it wasn't as I had imagined it to be. I'd definitely not learn what I know now. So to those people (and teachers) who had caused me much trouble and frustration, I now thank you for giving me such a wonderful opportunity to experience your backstabbing, gossips, troubles, nags and a whole lot other bad experiences. You guys have made me a much stronger and harder person. Thanks to you guys, I'd probably be able to handle what life throws at me much better. I'm no longer the shy and introverted girl you guys met back at Form one; now I'm the one that won't be blindly helping anyone and will dare to cuss and stick out the middle finger in your face. News flash, I could be a worse monster than you guys will ever be and it's all thanks to YOU. *evil smile*
The guilty shall feel the guilt, I need not name them.

Ah, now to relish my freedom by staying up late to read manga. I've got downloads dating back to four months ago that I've not yet read. Ta~

What's to Wonder?

Again, I'm compelled to type titles that have absolutely nothing to do with the content of my post, or have little to do with it.
Why? Cause I'm really, really, really, really, REALLY BORED.

Today is kinda like a day off from a job, at least that's what I feel like.
Too bad that we live in a country whose internet connection can fluctuate from really fast to absolutely positively f***kingly laggy and slow. I censored out the word because I'm thoughtful that children DO use the internet.
I may not seem like the kind that cuss, but I damn well know how to. I'm definitely not the nice goody-goody two shoes type. Now you know.

Why two posts a day? Because I'm bored and the net connection is so slow that it gets on my nerve when I'm trying to kill Ghost Pirates in WPT3 of MS. I really don't like dying and losing experience- 5% on lvl 9x is REALLY KILLING.

Yeah, most people can't get that I'm a gamer. Yup, I AM ONE.
When I tell someone that I have a character in a particular MMORPG, most of them would say either one of the following:

1. You serious ah? Don't lie lah. People like you who like to read don't game one lah.
2. Really? I didn't think that you'd be one. You certainly don't look like the type that spends her time playing online games.
3. Show me your character then I'll believe you.

Those people would then have their eyes pop out when they see the levels of my chars. Their mouths would drop when I told them that I once did P.Q in MS for three days straight without sleeping.
If you have noticed, even gaming lingo appears in some of my posts when I'm not careful to reread it.

If I'm not playing a game, then I'd probably be watching my bro playing one.
God of War, Dawn of War, Crash Bandicoot, Republic Commandos... Been there, seen that.

To tell the truth, I've been gaming quite a lot this year and I did pull an A.N on some of the school days (people's reaction: gasp!). Remember some of the times that I actually fell asleep in class? Half of it was due to A.N-ing, the other half was the usual school chore of revision. And it's kinda great the I don't get eyebags or panda eyes easily, that way no one would know. Ehehe...

But for the sake of SPM, I've stopped since umm...June, I think.
But some time around Sept, my internet died; I've been using my sis's com ever since.
I'd probably go back to gaming when I get a laptop. I know for sure that CABAL would definately be smoother cause of the awesome R.A.M that I'll have, not to mention the better graphic card.
I'm training another blader and will try to reach double trans before lvl 70. My wiz is already there and will only use it to fund my blader; don't have much to work on when I don't have a EOD. Training on death soldiers are kinda getting stale.
I'll also be trying to get my f/p mage to arch mage someday, just don't know when.

Oh well. I'll go watch tv now. Still so bored.

And Then There was One

The air and mood of the hall was calm, with a hint of tension. It was really quiet, the only sounds one could hear was the spinning of fans, the shuffling of papers, repositioning of legs, the ticking of the clock, clearing of throat and the occasional murmur of students.

Almost all eyes were on the clock located at the top of the wall, or at the watch on one's wrists. Each wondering why time seemed to fast forward to this very moment and then started to drag on. As the time ticked closer, each student became more and more restless.

The very words that relieved the burden of each (or almost each) student sitting for Physics III yesterday was,

Masa untuk menjawab telah tamat. Sila berhenti menulis and letakkan pen di atas meja. Sila pastikan nombor kad pengenalan dan nombor giliran anda telah dituliskan and ikatkan helaian tambahan anda. Guru pengawas akan mula mengutip kertas jawapan anda.

Translation:

The time for answering your paper is over. Pens down, please. Please make sure that you I.C and registration number are written in your answer booklets and tie up the extra sheets of papers you have used. The invigilators will be collecting the papers momentarily.

As soon as the papers were out of my hands, I felt a really huge burden has lifted off from my shoulders; the exact same way I felt after the Living Skills paper was collect two years ago. Finally, the last of my headaches are gone.

The exams aren't over yet, you know. There's still the one last subject, EST. Of course, I didn't celebrate the end yet, not until I'm officially done on the Thursday. Once I'm done, I'll do most of the stuff I wrote in my to-do list. That and I'll discuss about my college program and which college I'm going to attend next year with dad. I hope that he'll agree to what I've decided.

Since EST has nothing to do any revision for, I'll go watch some tv or do something fun. I've been entertainment deprived for far too long now.

Three-Two-One

As the day ends, I'm down with only three more subjects to sit for; 8 more papers to do.
I'm so excited!
I won't say anything about my papers; out of sight, out of mind.
But I am a lil happy though.

Next week is my last and final week in school. With the end of that week, I've 'graduated' from secondary school and will be awaiting the month where I'll go back into the school after three months, be all jittery and nervous as the teacher is getting my result slip, and then me crying because I did far worst than I had originally though. Then, I'd still go attend college and the result slip will be left unattended and collecting dust. I'm now prepared for the worst!
The sad thing is, nobody will be in school (nobody was there today too, so creepy); and I didn't even say goodbye to my juniors!
Oh well, I'll still randomly drop by the school next year, since bro is still in the school. I might even join him and Miss Tan in the archery club...Ehehe

With two of my headaches gone, namely add math and chemistry, I still have two more to go. Oddly enough, the only Science subject that I never have a tutor for is my best out of the three, Biology. I do hope that I can remember all the names of the bones, the mitosis and meiosis sequence and the knee-jerk reflex for the essays.

I guess this is all that I'll write this time, I'm pretty wiped out after a whole day of examination, from 8.00 a.m -3.30 pm; even with caffeine for breakfast.
I'll go play some Crash Bash before heading to bed. I'll do my revision on two years worth of Biology in two days and the same for Physics. Ta~

Six-Five-Four-Three-Two-One

Three subjects are done and gone, literally.

Yesterday, I bid adieu to Malay. I'll probably never use this language ever again, unless I'm forced to. Hmm, let me rethink...Yup, never.

And today, I bid farewell to History, or so I thought. For those who, like me, have already started scouting for courses to take on next year, you would probably have a brochures lying around right?
(This is only applicable to M'sians) Okay, take a look at the section where they give you the brief intro on the course. Beneath or beside the offered subjects, there is either a fine print or a huge box stating:

All local students are required to take 3 MQA Compulsory Subjects that include Bahasa Kebangsaan A, M'sia Studies and Morale Education.

That was taken from the Pre-U/ A-levels brochure I got from KBU.
And you might probably not want to press the 'delete history file' button in your brain just yet...

Ee Wynn, my senior, burst the bubble on me when she told me that LAN subjects are compulsory, which means that History and Morale is still waiting for me when I get to college. But wait...I can't see it in Sunway's brochure! Nope, I don't see it anywhere in the CIMP section! Does that mean I can escape (I really hope I can!).

Well, I do see an Interdisciplinary Studies that has the term 'required for M'sian students' at its side but it's under Social Science. So, I shouldn't need to worry about that, or should I?
The only way to find out for real is to attend the open day on the 13th-14th of Dec.

Tomorrow is Math. I really hope that I won't be as careless as I usually am. There's a hell lot of precious marks that I've lost whenever my tutor gave me mock examinations.

Speaking of examinations, I just wrote an essay about it during English I. I couldn't help but say examinations are good, no matter how much I loathe it.

There was another title that I've found interesting, My Perfect Wife/ Husband.
I imagined that the people who set the questions are fun-suckers that won't give out anything more interesting that paint drying so I was surprised.

Since it was interesting, why didn't I do it?
My answer would most probably be, I have nothing to write about. This might be the result of reading too much shoujo, but I don't have any idea how to write. That and probably because I've never really 'loved' anyone. Sure, I do love my family, but that's different. I did have crushes on some people, but they mostly die out real fast (the feeling, not the people); a week, give or take.
For me, admiration and respect would probably be the only feelings that I'll give; love...not so much, or even none at all.
The guy that I would come close to liking doesn't even exist.

Alright, when tomorrow ends, it'll be four down and six to go.

Almost There

I'm still not off the hook yet; at least until I'm 21. Heh.

SPM is in 2 days, and the first subject is Malay. Geez, where has all the time went?
(*cough* idled her time away*cough*)

The total days of examination are 8 days at the span of a month. There are breaks in between though. Now, where have I dumped my schedule...

*digs under piles of reference books; finds it lodged between Chem and Physics*

Ah, here it is:
The days in which I have to sit in the stuffy hall and be all nervous are : 11, 12, 13, 18, 20, 24, 25 and the 27th.
Science students are done earlier than Arts! Yay!

I don't know why, but I have a really good feeling about the exams...Maybe it's a premonition of something really bad happening! Maybe I'll find out that I don't qualify for the course I want to take next year! Arghhh! (I can't help being a pessimist)

My last paper will be ending at 3.15, so what am I going to do after that to celebrate my graduation?
The exact same thing I did for PMR 2 years ago; sleep.
I remembered my last paper ended at 10 in the morning. I didn't have my lunch and went straight to bed. I woke up later in the evening, went to the bathroom and then went back to bed. I think I'd most probably be doing the same thing this year.

Prom happens to be right after SPM, which is 3rd of Dec (if there isn't any date change). I'm not the type that attends this kind of event, nor any kind of social events.
Why?
- I'm dateless
- I don't own any sort of dress (nor am I about of waste my allowance on renting one)
- I don't like wearing make-up (it's like a coat of paint of my face, ewhh)
- I don't own any fancy shoes (all I have are sneakers and sandals)
- I have better things to do on that day

Besides, I won't even be around during the whole of December (like always). As to why, no one needs to know.
Even if I was around, I'd most probably be hanging out at Border's graphic novels section or catching a movie at the Cineplex. I'm finally free of school and exams, of course I'd want to enjoy myself for what limited time I have before being shipped off to boot camp (NS) and starting college.
I can't wait to start college too.

Speaking about college, I don't think I should worry too much about the upcoming exams. I mean, even if I don't do well (touchwood) I'll still be able to continue my studies. I've checked the requirements for the course I'm planning to take and all they require is the minimum of 5Cs. Also, it's not like I'm planning to take scholarships or anything. So, I'm seeing SPM as a sort of pass for me to get to college; the ticket and train analogy.

But getting good grades is kinda like having the bragging rights to something; and I'm definitely not the kind that likes to lose, especially to that stuck-up cousin of mine. He's been getting the exact same grades as I did since way, way back. I really should be less competitive.

I understand that grades aren't everything, but I just can't help but compare myself with others. Dad wasn't one of the best students during school time, but he's more successful compared them. Even Ms. Tan said that her non-degree holding friends are more successful, just because they dare to take chances.
Also, grandma used to say: Everyone wants to be No.1, but who's going to be No.2?
I never understood why she said that, I don't think I ever will, on a count that she's dead.
Oh well.